Desperation's End

Darkest nights I search, but no answers can be found.
Questions I ask, but no reply is heard.
This beast, the likes of which I never encountered,
Numbing pain, but still a shadow ripping at my soul.
Why does sorrow escape me, and to where has Emotion flown?
These things I do not know, but will one day learn.
Without hope or doubt,
Fear or courage,
What am I but an empty shell?
I do not hate,
Yet I do not love.
I lust for these things.
I long to feel these sensation, but alas...
I walk as a zombie in this cold, dark world.
When will they see my sufferings,
The things that make me who I am?
Who will cast a warm light on this cold, dead soul?
For now I shall stay lost.
For now I will find no way out.
My life blood shall pour from my body into that fathomless pit called Humanity.
Alone and lost I may be, but I must try,
Try to find a companion,
A friend,
An emotion.
My hope to feel the slightest of sensations will only end in pain.
But I think to myself...
At Desperation's End,
Pain is welcomed as a friend.